Honoring Anonymous Wee

It's prom season. I don't remember much about mine other than this: the girl I went with (whom I went with as a friend, so we could have fun) decided we were meant to be together and went all moody on me and sat at the table all night saying, "Fine. I'm fine. Fine." She was very cool up until then though. Oh, and I won a TV at the afterward, at the party casino afterprom. Black and White, but still, I won it. I'm always winning things. Just ask Heather. A few years ago I was at a big luncheon when they announced, "Someone has a sticker under their glass. If it's you, you win something." I think it was a book I won that day. Thing is, because I was so confident that I won, I made my co-worker turn over my glass to check it for me. I knew simply because I'm always winning crap. And I'm not trying to make a big deal about this; but you know those people (you're probably one of them) who are always saying, "Man, I never win ANYthing." Well, that's because I'm ususally the one winning their stuff. I bet that'd be irritating. But I wouldn't know.

Tangent over.

So prom. I don't have alot to say about it. I just found this picture of my sister, whom I'm thinking too much about these days. Praying for her, celebrating a thousand memories I have of her, laughing at all the dumb things she has done, knowing that she'll be glad that I've whitened her teeth up in this picture. And she will thank me for it. She is the person I celebrate this week. And why? I don't know that I can tell you completely, other than to say she is one of the most incredible people ever. And I know this is true. Here's a few reasons why.

First of all her name is Trina, but I've called her "Wee" since I could talk. My girls call her Wee Wee. So on with the reasons.

She's strong? Amazingly. Don't know how she has made it as far as she has in life. People with our back story don't usually do too well, and well...we are pretty freaking awesome, if I do say so myself. We both think so. She has defied all odds in her life and always will.

Things I love about her. One of the people she mentored was a stripper. How exactly does that happen? Well, with Trina, it happens because she is one of those people that strippers seem to gravitate toward, and not because she stuffs bills in their money belt. It's because there is no fear of judgment from her, and they feel that. What's more is, she wouldn't just put up with the stripper and not judge her. That'd be way too christian with a small "c". Nope. She has celebrated this girl. Like really celebrated her. Like talked to me on the phone about her, saying all kinds of nice things, and I'd say, "The stripper?" just to make sure I knew who she was talking about. And it's not like she tries to find something positive about her, like some grandma might about their murdering grandson in the state penn. It's just comes from down deep in her golden heart somewhere. She really believes in this girl, that she's worth while, that's she's good. Love that about her. Kinda makes me wish I was a stripper.

Another thing I love about her. Changes her hair about every 6 to 8 weeks. And I'm not talking a haircut here. I'm talking full blown color, streaks, chip and a chop, bang in, bang out styling makeovers. And always calls me with the same message: "My hair looks sooooo cute! You should see it. Wait, I'll take a picture on my phone and send it to you." Great self worth, and has every reason for it.

Hmmm... she's probably made me laugh harder than anyone I've ever known. For instance, she's been doing Yoga for years, which is so not her - at least I didn't think so. But she loves it. So one evening she calls me while she's doing her yoga and having a glass of wine; must've been stress. Anyway, she says, "Have you ever stood on your head while you were drinking wine?" No. "It makes you dizzy!" "Really? Interesting." She's hilarious. And while she makes me laugh all the time, she probably laughs more than anyone I've ever known.

One of my very favorite things is how she is alway cross examining clerks at whatever store she goes into. Here is an example of the possible discourse with a clerk at the local video store:

Her: "Hey, what if this DVD is scratched?"
Clerk: "Ummm. What do you mean?"
Her: "Well, if it starts skipping, what do you guys do?"
Clerk: "You just bring it back."
Her: "So I have to bring it back? And then what? You just give me a new one and that's it?
Clerk: "Uhhh...yeah."
Her: "That doesn't seem fair. Shouldn't you give me a few free rentals or something?" (slight look at me and laughing. "I mean, Cmon."
Me: (Internal conversation with myself) "Why does she do this? What does she have against clerks? Did one break up with her in high school? Was it her secret ambition to be one but she just couldn't cut it?"
Her: "Have a nice day." (and then to me) "What?!"
The End

She's a serious Mother. Her kids are now 23, 20, and 19 and they all love her, call her, talk to her, are friends with her, are themselves with her, don't hide from her. That's a dream for all of us with kids. It's mine for sure.

She loves my wife and is always telling me how awesome Heather is. This is a great quality in a sister, especially since brothers and sisters who are close can tend to really dislike the person their sibling marries; especially if they are altogether different than them. And let's just say Heather and Trina probably wouldn't be classified in the same category on the Myers Briggs personality profile. Where Heather would be steak and a baked potato, Trina would be pop rocks and sugar bread. ;) A sister that celebrates your wife, and is not threatened by her, has to be one who is true; to themselves and others. There's great honor in that.

I love that she can't really get mad. Definitely not MAD mad. She told me she was going to try to get mad one time. She said her kids and hubby were bugging her and she was going to see if she could throw a great big fit and scare them all. Well, after the big fit she called to tell me, "I couldn't really get my voice to scream very loud. It kept cracking and the kids just started laughing at me?" "So what did you do?" I asked. "Did you keep up the charade?" "Well, I tried, but I think they could tell I was faking it. But when I threw Rich's laptop at the fireplace they stopped laughing at me." "You what?!!! You threw his computer at the fireplace?!!! So were you really mad when you threw it?" I asked. "Mmmm...not really. But like I told you, I wanted to throw a fit. A BIG one."

Best part about my sister. She's always there. Always. We came up together...survivors. We went through the death of my brother together. I talk to her on the phone 5 or 6 times a week. She is 6 and a half years older than me and has honesly been like a mother to me in many ways. When I was little and she could drive, she would take me everywhere with her. My mom and step dad would send her to get pop all the time and she and I would get in the car and go. We'd escape for 2o or 30 minutes and laugh and sing whatever was on G-98. At the store she would buy me those Cellar's chocalate covered cherries. They were 2 for a quarter. I thought she was the absolute coolest person I had ever seen.

Whe she got ready for dates I would watch her fix her Farrah Fawcett hair (flip head down...1,2,3 brush, brush - flip head up and POOF- Charlie's Angels) I always thought she looked so cool putting on make up and talking all...highschool. She was only 17 or so at the time, but she could've been 35 to me. She seemed so old, but she was just a kid.

When I was in elementary school there was a talent show and I wanted to sing for it but was too scared. Trina talked me into it. She took me to the music store and picked out a song the kids in my school "would love." Barry Manilow. "Seriously? They'll love this? Who is this guy?" "Oh trust me," she says, "They will love this song." The song? Can't Smile Without You. We practiced it a thousand times in her bedroom, singing to the giant vinyl album, of course. I didn't win the talent show that year. I didn't even place, but I did it - and loved it. And my sister was there, cheering me on the whole time. The next year I entered again and won 2nd place out of the whole school, and she was there again. She was always there.

It probably sounds odd to some, to say my sister was there for me - encouraging me, even raising me; but she was - and I'm a better man because of it. Because of her.

So here's to you Wee. Surely the best sister ever! Now get a blog and make yourself an official part of this forum. We're all waiting for you!!!

I'd like to sign off this blog with the cheesy, but very appropriate lyrics to the first song I've ever performed before a crowd, at my sister's prodding.

I love you more than I can tell you. Thanks for everything you've ever done for me, and for everything you are.

Can't Smile Without You
(whistling intro)
You know I Can't Smile Without You
I Can't Smile Without You
I can't laugh and I can't sing
I'm finding it hard to do anything
You see, I feel sad when you're sad
I feel glad when you're glad
If You only knew what I'm go ing through
I just Can't Smile Without You

You came along just like a song and brightened my day
Who'd've believe that you were part of a dream
Now it all seems light years away

Now some people say happiness takes so very long to find
Well I'm finding it hard leaving your love behind me

I Can't Smile Without You
I Can't Smile Without You
I can't laugh and I can't sing
I'm findin' it hard to do anything
Y ou see, I feel sad when you're sad
I feel glad when you're glad
If You only knew what I'm going through
I just Can't Smile Without You